He saw her immediatly, a new face was rare in his job and this one he was sure he never would forget. Not because of its beauty but the expression was intense, in a way he felt anxiety and hate. He wasn´t a person who easily exploded into emotion on the contrary specially hate he never had felt before, so he was irritated that this face had deeply touched him immediatly.
A church, dark, high above some light is falling through the dome, a cruzifix in the middle, showing Jesus in his ordinary pain, common for the whole christianity. Some people are sitting in the rows, young students, few older ones, quiety reigns there are still some more minutes to the beginning of regular sunday morning divine service. A woman rushes in, not looking around. She´s like an animal followed by the hunter, there´s an alarming whistling in her eyes, not because of a special colour just flackering like candles. It´s amazing and he isn´t the only one who notice it.
God, why are you so cruel, what´s the necessity to present her to me, are you god and devil in person? Are you testing my skill to withdraw from danger? She is devil if you are not and I´m attracted not by sex or love but because of the danger and death of rebellion and freedom she seems to personify. "J´ai peur", he whispered and begged his master pardon. "I don´t want to go through this." No excuse: Go! And be brave.
After church she went home, feeling much better and in a way relieved from all the pains that ached her. There were strength in the words of the priest, he was absolutely religious and believed what he was talking about. She felt that it wasn´t an easy way he was going with his god but in fact a way. She could imagine his struggles and fights his thoughts of unbelieve and rebellion, sometimes his trials to run away from the power of an instance he never will be able to understand. But his character is firm and he is strong enough to get through all difficulties. She admired but she saw without doubt that it never could have been her way. She stood aside and the door to enter paradies was closed for her.
Dear Anne,
I´m not strong and firm as you think I am and the imagination to meet you made me shiver, I´m anxious and I know it. I would withdrew your invitation of drinking tea together but even therefore I havn´t enough strength. Being a catholic priest I´m sure you think I´m afraid of your gender in general but that´s not the reason at all. You have a power and nearly don´t know of its existance and I fear that I´m predestinated to wake it up. We should meet nevertheless, perhaps my dark thoughts are wrong. See you sunday after church.
Brian
God, what have you done, is this really you I adored and whorshipped for years? My believes are destroyed not a single word of the bible and of all that is said in religious context seems true and right any more. I´ve lost everything, not only strength and will and character but truth, justice and the believe in live. I´ve lost you, god, and it´s your fault: you sent me Anne you created her as she is and you gave her the power she has. And it was you who let me meet her to wake up her possibilities. Oh god, what have I done, I was only an unnecessary priest totally in your hand and my whole life in your circle of power. And now I´ve fitted together the two big entidies that reigns word: creation and destruction, the cabel was capped but I pasted it: Energy streams intensely. I´m overwhelmed.
Anne looked up and saw directly in god´s eyes. She knew the moment was there for which she had longed. There wasn´t the chance to escape any more and she felt prepared for the gigantic fight that had to take place and in which the universe would burn down completely. It was time to start and to kill definitively the enemy: "I´m death and hate and even you had to obey. Your creation is rubbish you´ve done only pain to your world, I despise you. Why was I thrown out of your heaven, why have you closed my eyes so that I had to live all the centuries without knowing who I am?"
The universe waited for an answer from the only one who it thought was able to give it: Silence.
A church, dark, high above some light is falling through the dome, a cruzifix in the middle, showing Jesus in his ordinary pain, common for the whole christianity. Some people are sitting in the rows, young students, few older ones, quiety reigns there are still some more minutes to the beginning of regular sunday morning divine service. A woman rushes in, not looking around. She´s like an animal followed by the hunter, there´s an alarming whistling in her eyes, not because of a special colour just flackering like candles. It´s amazing and he isn´t the only one who notice it.
God, why are you so cruel, what´s the necessity to present her to me, are you god and devil in person? Are you testing my skill to withdraw from danger? She is devil if you are not and I´m attracted not by sex or love but because of the danger and death of rebellion and freedom she seems to personify. "J´ai peur", he whispered and begged his master pardon. "I don´t want to go through this." No excuse: Go! And be brave.
After church she went home, feeling much better and in a way relieved from all the pains that ached her. There were strength in the words of the priest, he was absolutely religious and believed what he was talking about. She felt that it wasn´t an easy way he was going with his god but in fact a way. She could imagine his struggles and fights his thoughts of unbelieve and rebellion, sometimes his trials to run away from the power of an instance he never will be able to understand. But his character is firm and he is strong enough to get through all difficulties. She admired but she saw without doubt that it never could have been her way. She stood aside and the door to enter paradies was closed for her.
Dear Anne,
I´m not strong and firm as you think I am and the imagination to meet you made me shiver, I´m anxious and I know it. I would withdrew your invitation of drinking tea together but even therefore I havn´t enough strength. Being a catholic priest I´m sure you think I´m afraid of your gender in general but that´s not the reason at all. You have a power and nearly don´t know of its existance and I fear that I´m predestinated to wake it up. We should meet nevertheless, perhaps my dark thoughts are wrong. See you sunday after church.
Brian
God, what have you done, is this really you I adored and whorshipped for years? My believes are destroyed not a single word of the bible and of all that is said in religious context seems true and right any more. I´ve lost everything, not only strength and will and character but truth, justice and the believe in live. I´ve lost you, god, and it´s your fault: you sent me Anne you created her as she is and you gave her the power she has. And it was you who let me meet her to wake up her possibilities. Oh god, what have I done, I was only an unnecessary priest totally in your hand and my whole life in your circle of power. And now I´ve fitted together the two big entidies that reigns word: creation and destruction, the cabel was capped but I pasted it: Energy streams intensely. I´m overwhelmed.
Anne looked up and saw directly in god´s eyes. She knew the moment was there for which she had longed. There wasn´t the chance to escape any more and she felt prepared for the gigantic fight that had to take place and in which the universe would burn down completely. It was time to start and to kill definitively the enemy: "I´m death and hate and even you had to obey. Your creation is rubbish you´ve done only pain to your world, I despise you. Why was I thrown out of your heaven, why have you closed my eyes so that I had to live all the centuries without knowing who I am?"
The universe waited for an answer from the only one who it thought was able to give it: Silence.
Eingestellt von inga Am/um
12:18
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