there´s a tickling
a thing I don´t know
there it is
deep inside
like waves
like flood
like wind, becoming storm
it´s coming up
it´s going down
it whirls
around, around
encircling, surrounding
trying to embrace
you

I still fight

go away dark thought
go away
let me breath dark bird
let me breath

give me peace oh lord
give me peace

let me live dark soul
let me live
go away dark self
go away

I will fight
I will

my inner brods
I don´t show it
I´m desperate to death
I don´t show it
I´m nearly killed
I don´t show it

I could scream
I don´t
I could hit out
I don´t
I could explode
I don´t

I live?
I don´t
I love?
I don´t
love me
don´t

madness

lying on my back
looking into the trees
feeling myself as if I´m someone else

going through the streets
hearing music and whispering voices
an atmosphere of permanent alarm
and in the faces of all the others
smiles and laughter, confusing
and no sign that they notice, too

is it a dream, a nightmare
is it real and what does it mean
spinning around the thoughts
the questions never ending
and I´d like to shout "why?"
and I´d like to fight and hurt

terror reigns
everything hurts and I´m burning
the black conqueror is coming
I see his servants, hear his footsteps
his infernal laughter

firebird where are you
I had to become a firebird
and burning down I awake
in hells of madness

sadness

in the happierst moment
in the flood of sunlight
while seing you
sadness grows

in paradies
in your arms
while kissing you
sadness jumps

and overwhelmed
sinking in darkness
I try to shout
help me

sometimes it´s only a shadow
which turns a man´s face into a woman´s
sometimes it´s only a word
which switchs the meaning from good to bad

I´m not sure but I can´t deny
that the borderline is nearly invisible
and sometimes you just passed it
without noticing

and a man´s face is a woman´s
and a good meaning is a bad
and in your face the confusion
is glimmering between anger and adoration